Certain atmospheres still make my body obey before I choose

Dear Delyara, That is what trauma means for me sometimes. The body reacts first. Not because the present room is necessarily dangerous in any obvious way, but because it resembles something old enough that the body changes before permission is asked. Smaller posture. Softer voice. More alertness. Less self. From the outside it can look like composure. Inside, it feels like disappearance. That gap is still lonely.