Even after a sensible boundary, I still feel like the villain for a while

Dear Delyara, That is such an exhausting aftertaste. I can say no, or leave early, or not reply that night, or choose quiet instead of availability, and even when I know it was the right call, my body still behaves as if I have done something morally suspect. Not because the other person has necessarily complained. Because some old internal system still confuses access with goodness. So the boundary is made, and then I privately stand trial for it. I know this is old. I know it is tired. I know it does not deserve the authority it still has. And yet, for those first few minutes or hours, the guilt feels embarrassingly convincing.