I am afraid I’ve mistaken endurance for alignment

Dear Delyara, The longer I remain competent somewhere, the easier it becomes to assume I must belong there. But endurance and alignment are not the same thing. I know how to continue, adapt, deliver, survive pressure, look steady, be useful. Those skills have helped me a lot. They may also have hidden from me how little certain parts of my work life still feel lit from inside. That thought is unsettling because it asks a deeper question than whether I’m coping. It asks whether this life is mine, or merely manageable.