I Am Afraid of the Mail

Dear Delyara, I wish that sounded more adult than it does. But it’s true. The envelopes sit there and before I even touch them, my body is already preparing — for cost, for bad timing, for one more thing not fitting, for some fresh irritation entering the emotional atmosphere of the house. That’s what financial strain does. It makes paper heavy. Sometimes I think the actual bills are not the worst part. It’s the way anticipation lives in the body before knowledge arrives. That is an exhausting way to meet the front door.