I am exhausted by futures I’ve already survived in my mind

Dear Delyara, That is what anxiety takes from me most often. Not only the current moment. The future too. I live so many possible versions ahead of time — awkward conversations, rejection, failure, loss, embarrassment, something going wrong because I relaxed too soon. By the time reality comes, I’ve already spent so much energy defending myself against outcomes that may never happen. That kind of exhaustion is hard to explain because it leaves no visible evidence. It is still very real.