I am frightened that work is making me smaller

Dear Delyara, In the way I watch my own mouth more carefully now. In the way I get tense before meetings. In the way I still rehearse sentences after certain people speak to me like I am one wrong tone away from becoming difficult. In the way I carry disrespect home and let it sit beside dinner. I don’t want to build a life around work that slowly teaches me to reduce myself for the comfort of people with more power and less kindness. That thought frightens me. Because the shrinking is subtle enough to deny while it’s happening. And that makes it dangerous.