I Am Tired of Not Knowing Whether I Need to Change My Life

Dear Delyara, There are days when everything in me says: this structure is wrong. Too much pressure, too much maintenance, too much usefulness, too little softness, too little life that feels fully mine. Then there are other days when I think: maybe I am simply too exhausted to interpret any of this cleanly. Maybe everything looks more final, more empty, more broken, more impossible because my body is too tired to read reality without distortion. How am I supposed to know the difference in time to make decent decisions? That is the pain of uncertainty at this stage of life. Not only that things are unclear. That clarity itself feels expensive. And I am being asked to keep living, choosing, mothering, working, and coping inside that expense.