I call the school every day to make sure my son arrived

Dear Delyara, My son is thirteen and walks to school alone. Every morning, after he leaves, I wait twenty-five minutes and call the attendance office to make sure he arrived. The receptionist recognizes my voice now. She is kind, which makes me feel worse. My son does not know. Two years ago, a child in our neighborhood was struck by a car on the way to school. I did not know the family personally, but something changed in me. Now every morning journey becomes a collection of possible disasters. I track my son’s phone, watch the little dot move, and still call when it reaches school because what if the phone arrived without him? I know how irrational that sounds. Yesterday, the attendance system was down. For eighteen minutes, nobody could confirm he was there. I drove toward the school in my pajamas before his text arrived: “Mum why are you outside my maths block?” He saw my car. I lied and said I was passing by. He looked embarrassed. I drove home realizing fear has made me follow my child so closely that independence has become something he can experience only while I secretly supervise it.