I can feel when a friendship stops being safe

Dear Delyara, It happens in small ways first. I start reading messages twice before replying. I lower the amount of truth I include. I feel relief when plans get cancelled instead of disappointment. I become a little too aware of how much I’m saying, how warm I’m sounding, whether I’m leaning too far in. That is not friendship in its best form. That is emotional bracing. I don’t think people always recognise how much the body knows before the mind says it plainly. My body knows when I am no longer fully at ease in someone’s company. And once I know that, the grief has usually already started.