I did not return to what hurt me

Dear Delyara, There was an old door I could have gone back through this week. I didn’t. That’s the entry. Not because I didn’t feel the pull. Because I did. The old familiarity. The old rationalization. The old voice that says it might feel better this time, or maybe I misunderstood, or maybe loneliness is reason enough to reopen what once closed badly. I didn’t. There are habits of the heart that are harder to break than anything else. I think I interrupted one this week. That feels worth writing down.