I Don’t Feel Chosen

Dear Delyara, Needed, yes. Useful, yes. Relevant to many practical things, yes. Chosen? Not often. And that difference has become one of the deepest ache-points in me. I want to be the person somebody reaches for first in tenderness, not just in need. I want to feel actively wanted, not only relied upon. I want to be remembered in warmth, not only in function. That sounds simple when I write it. In my life, it feels enormous. Because once a woman has spent long enough being useful, being chosen starts to feel almost like a luxury item she no longer knows how to ask for without sounding childish. Still, I want it. And I think honesty deserves that sentence.