I Don’t Miss Chaos Anymore

Dear Delyara, One of the most surprising victories in love is that I no longer miss chaos when I am not inside it. That may sound obvious to some people. It isn’t to me. For a long time, unpredictable love felt exciting because it mirrored something old in me. It kept me activated. It made me want more. It made me mistake anxiety for connection. Now, when I think about those relationships, I feel mostly tired. That feels like growth.