I eat food from the trash after everyone sleeps

Dear Delyara, I have binge-eating disorder. During the day, I follow strict meal plans, speak confidently about health, and pack balanced lunches for my children. At night, after everyone sleeps, I eat until I feel pain. Yesterday, I threw away a cake to stop myself from finishing it. At two in the morning, I retrieved it from the trash, scraped coffee grounds from the frosting, and ate it standing over the sink. My husband came downstairs for water. I hid the plate behind my back like a child. He saw the trash on my sleeve and did not ask. His silence was worse than disgust would have been. I have attended therapy before and stopped when the binges decreased. Now they are worse. Food is everywhere because a family lives here. I cannot remove the substance from the house or stop needing it to survive. This morning, my daughter asked why the cake was gone. I said the trash bag had torn and ruined it. She apologized because she had wanted me to save a piece. I had saved all of it and then eaten it where nobody could see me becoming desperate.