I entered the courtroom through the front door

Dear Delyara, I had avoided court for two years after my former partner breached a restraining order and waited outside the building. When the new case was listed, I considered withdrawing my statement. A witness-support officer arranged a separate waiting area, transport, and screens in the courtroom. We visited the building twice before the hearing so my body could learn the route without him present. Today, I arrived through the front entrance rather than the secure side door. I wanted to prove to myself that the building belonged to witnesses too. My legs shook while security checked my bag. In court, I answered every question and asked for one break when panic rose. He was convicted of breaching the order. Afterward, I stood on the courthouse steps for a photograph only I will keep. Courage was not the absence of terror. It was making the institutions designed to protect me adapt enough that I did not have to disappear in order to use them.