I exercise until my body punishes me

Dear Delyara, People congratulate me for discipline. I wake at four, run before work, lift weights at lunch, and take another class after dinner. I have completed marathons, posted transformation photographs, and built a social media account around health. Nobody sees me pacing the hallway at midnight because my watch says I have not burned enough calories. I ran with a stress fracture last month until the bone worsened and the doctor ordered six weeks of rest. I lasted three days. Tonight, I used my husband’s car to drive to a gym across town where no one knows I am injured. I taped my foot and ran ten kilometers. Every step hurt. The pain felt like evidence that I had not become lazy while healing. My daughter asked why I limp. I told her I twisted my ankle. She is ten and has started doing squats beside me, asking how many calories they burn. I thought I had built a body nobody could shame again. Instead, I have created a life where missing one workout feels like moral failure, and my child is already learning the language.