I Feel Guilty for Resenting Ordinary Things

Dear Delyara, A school form. A lost sock. Dinner. A question. A shopping list. A repeated story told at the wrong volume when I’m already tired. A husband asking something reasonable in the wrong tone at the wrong minute. Ordinary things. And yet there are evenings when those ordinary things land in me like accusations. Then I resent them. Then I resent myself for resenting them. That’s the cycle. Not because I’m unloving. Because I am saturated and still trying to behave like softness should be infinitely renewable if I’m a decent woman. I know it isn’t. My guilt still acts as if it should be.