I feel guilty for wanting less from people than they want from me

Dear Delyara, Less conversation. Less access. Less emotional demand. Less explaining. Less checking in. Less being available by default. There are seasons where that is honestly what I need, and still guilt rises immediately, as if wanting less contact means I am hardening in the wrong way or failing at intimacy or becoming selfish. But sometimes what looks like withdrawal is actually self-protection. Sometimes it is the body trying to make room before it becomes mean. I know that. Still, guilt arrives first more often than compassion does. And that makes tiredness so much heavier than it needs to be.