I Feel Used Up

Dear Delyara, That is the cleanest truth I have. Not broken exactly. Not collapsed. Not dramatic enough to make other people stop and say, “This is serious.” Just used up. Used up by work, by family, by the endless decisions, by emotional management, by practical life, by always being the one who notices, remembers, anticipates, softens, and carries. Used up by the performance of being “fine enough” in rooms that keep benefiting from the fact that I can still function. That is the worst part. I can still function. So from the outside, everything remains respectable. Inside, I feel thin in the wrong places. Less alive. Less curious. Less able to meet my own life with softness instead of private resentment. I think burnout gets missed when it comes wearing competence. Mine does.