I felt more tired of being understandable than of being tired

Dear Delyara, That sentence arrived in me and felt true immediately. I can handle tiredness better than I can handle having to narrate it, justify it, translate it into something reasonable enough for other people and for the stricter parts of myself to accept. Sometimes the real exhaustion is not the state itself. It’s the packaging. Today I didn’t want to explain why I was quieter, slower, less bright, less socially easy. I wanted those things to be allowed without needing an excellent supporting essay. That never feels fully possible. But I wanted it strongly.