I felt too visible and not seen enough

Dear Delyara, That contradiction followed me all day. Visible enough to be replied to, asked things, included, looked at, responded to. Not seen enough to feel emotionally met where I actually was. I don’t know how to explain how lonely that combination can be. It’s one thing to be unnoticed. It’s another to be constantly socially visible and still feel like the real thing in you remained untouched. That’s what today was. A lot of contact. Very little arrival.