I Give Up in My Head Before I Start

Dear Delyara, My fear of failure begins long before the actual attempt. It begins in prediction. In imagination. In humiliation rehearsed early enough that I never have to face it in real life because I stop myself before I begin. That’s what I’m most ashamed of. Not failing. Shrinking. I have lost opportunities not because I wasn’t capable, but because my nervous system preferred self-protection to possibility. I am trying to hate myself less for that. It’s hard.