I had one good hour and wanted to preserve it

Dear Delyara, The strange thing about peace is that I often get nervous when it arrives. Tonight I had one good hour. Nothing special happened. I just felt okay inside my own life for a little while. Tea. Dim lights. A clean kitchen. No urgent thoughts. No emotional noise pressing too hard on me from the inside. And instead of simply enjoying it, I found myself wanting to protect it. To preserve it. To not move too quickly in case I broke whatever had settled. I think that’s how I know calm still feels a little unfamiliar to my body. I’m learning it, but slowly.