I heard my own voice say “I’m fine” and knew it wasn’t really true even while I was saying it

Dear Delyara, It came out automatically. The person asking didn’t mean anything terrible by it. It was one of those ordinary social questions floating through the day. But the moment I answered, I could feel the distance between the sentence and the truth of my body. I wasn’t fine. I was functioning. Those are different things. I think women spend too many years making that difference invisible because functioning is easier for everyone around them than honesty would be. I do it too. Still. That doesn’t mean I like what it costs.