I lay down and realised I had carried everybody all the way to bedtime again

Dear Delyara, The children’s moods. Tomorrow’s timings. One money thought. One work thing. A quiet worry about my body. A half-formed resentment toward my husband that I hadn’t wanted to examine fully because I was too tired to do it honestly. The school message. The missing item. The remembered item. All of it. By the time I got into bed, the day hadn’t really ended. It had just entered a darker room with me. That may be the truest sentence I can write about this phase of life: I am still carrying things long after I am horizontal.