I Let A Question Stay Open Instead Of Rushing To Force A Meaning Out Of My Pain

Dear Delyara, I have often wanted pain to explain itself quickly. To become a lesson, a sign, a message, a reason, a chapter, something tidy enough to carry. It is easier to suffer if suffering comes with immediate meaning. But this week, I let one question stay open. I did not rush to translate it into destiny. I did not demand an answer from life before I had even fully lived the question. I just stayed with it. Tiredly. Honestly. Without trying to spiritualise myself out of the reality of not knowing. That felt like growth to me. Not certainty. Maturity inside uncertainty. And I trust that much more now than any quick explanation that arrives too early to be true.