I Let the Dog Out and Wanted to Go With Him

Dear Delyara, He ran into the yard like his whole body trusted the night. No hesitation. No mental list. No guilt about stepping away from the house for two minutes. He just pushed through the screen door and disappeared into the dark grass with his nose to the ground like he belonged completely to himself. I stood there holding the door open and felt this sudden ridiculous envy. I wanted that kind of freedom. To leave the house without carrying everybody in my head. To move through the world without calculating what I was forgetting, who I was disappointing, what would be waiting when I came back in. The dog did his business, sniffed the fence, and came back. I locked the door behind him and went back to packing lunches. But for one second, I really did want to run.