I’m scared work is teaching me to become smaller

Dear Delyara, In the way I think too hard before speaking. In the way I can still carry one dismissive tone home for hours. In the way I rehearse perfectly reasonable sentences as if I’m preparing for battle. In the way I sometimes choose quiet over self-respect because I cannot face spending one more evening recovering from workplace disrespect. That is what frightens me. Not only bad days. The possibility of adapting to them. I don’t want a life where work slowly teaches me to reduce myself for the comfort of people who would replace me in a week. That thought sits in me heavily.