I miss being known without needing to introduce myself emotionally every time

Dear Delyara, I’m tired of building the bridge from the beginning. This is why I’m quiet, this is what’s underneath it, this is how today landed on me, this is why that thing hit harder than it sounds, this is why I’m low but not exactly sad, this is why I need a softer room around me. I can explain all of that if I have to. I just wish I didn’t always have to. There is such a deep form of closeness in being partially understood before explanation begins. I miss that. Perhaps more than I say. It’s a very adult loneliness, I think — not lack of contact, but lack of emotionally accurate familiarity.