I nearly snapped at the dog and knew I needed to go to bed

Dear Delyara, He was only barking at the postman. Nothing unusual. Nothing malicious. Nothing worthy of the amount of irritation that flashed through me in that second. But the sharpness of my own reaction startled me. I wasn’t angry at the dog. I was used up. And when you’re used up, even harmless noise can land like an accusation. That moment saved me from pretending. I stopped what I was doing, turned the kitchen light off, checked the back door, and went upstairs earlier than usual. The sink still had things in it. The email could wait. The school uniform would survive until morning. I knew if I stayed up trying to prove I was still functioning, I would only become meaner in small ways. I’m learning that the kindest thing I can do for everyone sometimes is stop the day before the day strips me thinner than I can afford.