I sat in the GP waiting room and felt older than I expected

Dear Delyara, There were posters about blood pressure, menopause, cholesterol, bowel checks, sleep, stress, bones, fatigue — all the ordinary medical language of middle age laid out under bright lights while people pretended not to read each other’s worry. I was there for something minor. At least I hope it’s minor. Still, just being in that room made me feel suddenly aware of time in a way I hadn’t wanted that day. The body changes. The appointments become more frequent. The questions become less about quick fixes and more about ongoing management. And underneath all of it is that private, childish resistance to becoming someone whose life now includes regular medical vocabulary. I called my name in my head before the nurse did. That’s how ready and not ready I felt at the same time.