I sometimes work harder on looking ready than on becoming brave

Dear Delyara, I know that sentence hits something true because I hate it. Looking ready is safer. Better notes, cleaner plan, better language, a more impressive frame around the thing. Bravery is messier. It begins before I feel fully armored, before I can guarantee emotional control, before success has come forward to make the whole exposure look wise. I have lost time to this. A lot of time. I don’t think I fear hard work. I fear being seen trying with my real skin showing.