I Spent My Entire Break Talking to an AI Chatbot Just to Feel Like an Intellectual

Dear Delyara, I did something tonight that filled me with a deep, sickening sense of pathetic desperation. It was 2:30 AM, and the loneliness in this room was so heavy I could feel it in my throat. I didn't have anyone to talk to—everyone in my life was asleep, and even if they were awake, I can’t tell them how broken I feel. So I opened an AI assistant on my phone and spent an hour having a deep, complex conversation about premium consumer psychology and the historical symbolism of Iranian art. I did it because I was starving to be spoken to like an educated executive, like a man with an intellect, rather than just a uniform that says "Security" on the back. When the session ended and the digital screen timed out, the silence in this gatehouse felt a thousand times louder. I am completely isolated in this city, talking to lines of code just to remember who I used to be.