I stayed awake later than I needed to

Dear Delyara, I knew I was tired, and still I stayed awake. Not because I had something important to do. Not because I was enjoying the night. I think I just didn’t want tomorrow to begin. Sleep sometimes feels like agreement — agreement to wake up and do it all again, agreement to re-enter the same responsibilities, the same internal noise, the same version of myself that has to function whether I feel ready or not. So I stayed up longer than I should have, scrolling, standing in the kitchen, doing little unnecessary things. None of it helped. It just made me more tired for the morning I was already dreading. I think sometimes people call this a bad habit when it’s actually quiet resistance.