I still do things, but the hunger is weaker

Dear Delyara, There was a time when ambition felt more alive in me. Not louder, necessarily. Just cleaner. I used to want things with less emotional negotiation. Now even desire feels tired. Every goal arrives with practical concerns attached to it — cost, energy, disappointment, timing, sustainability, whether I can bear to care that much if the world doesn’t cooperate. I still move. Still work. Still make plans. But the hunger underneath is not what it was. I miss that version of wanting. I don’t know if it’s maturity to lose it, or grief.