I still feel guilty when I choose less contact

Dear Delyara, There are times when I know exactly what I need: fewer messages, fewer plans, less social reachability, a quieter evening, more distance from tone and expectation and access. And still guilt arrives. As if needing less contact means I am becoming selfish or unloving or emotionally mean. I know that is not true. I know capacity is real. Still, guilt has such a fast way of turning need into accusation. I think some of us were trained to experience self-protection as betrayal. I’m trying to unlearn that.