I still long for softer emotional language than they know how to speak

Dear Delyara, I understand them better now. That helps. It does not cure the ache. I still long for something simpler and gentler than what was available: care without awkwardness, recognition without detour, concern that reaches the body as care instead of arriving disguised as advice, correction, practicality, or clumsy love. I know they did what they knew. And still, I feel what I did not receive. Both truths live together in me.