I Still Revisit That Decision

Dear Delyara, There is one decision I still revisit when I’m tired. Maybe that’s why it returns at night more than in the morning. At night I have less strength to defend myself from old shame. The mind gets sloppy then. Softer around the edges. More vulnerable to old roads. I replay the moment and imagine different endings. What if I had been braver? What if I had left sooner? What if I had stayed? What if I had said the thing? What if I had stopped myself? Regret is such an exhausting storyteller.