I Stopped Asking for a Perfect Sign

Dear Delyara, I used to want clarity in spectacular forms. A sign. A certainty. An answer that would remove the emotional labour of choosing, staying, leaving, trusting, not knowing. I wanted spiritual life to simplify the human one in obvious ways. Lately, my prayer has changed. Now I ask for honesty. For steadiness. For the courage not to abandon myself while still uncertain. For enough inner truth that I do not have to turn confusion into panic or delay into denial. That shift feels much more mature. And much more useful. Because my life is still uncertain in many places. What has changed is not the absence of uncertainty. It is my willingness to remain a person inside it, rather than trying to force life into clarity before I can bear myself. That feels like spiritual growth to me now.