I Stopped Asking for Guarantees

Dear Delyara, My spiritual life changed when I stopped asking for certainty. I used to pray like I was trying to secure a contract with the future. Keep this safe. Prevent that pain. Give me signs. Give me guarantees. Tell me exactly where this is going before I trust it. Now I pray differently. Now I ask for steadiness. For wisdom. For the ability to stay soft without falling apart. For the courage to not know everything. That feels more honest than certainty ever did.