I Took the Longest Shower I Could Defend

Dear Delyara, Long enough to breathe. Not long enough for anybody to knock and ask if I’d fallen in. That’s how I measured it. I washed my hair twice just to stay longer. Stood under the hot water until my skin turned pink and the mirror disappeared completely. In there, with the fan on and the curtain closed, I did not have to be warm, interesting, patient, or available. I only had to exist. I think that’s why showers make me emotional lately. Not because they’re relaxing. Because they are the only place in the house where my body still belongs fully to me for ten uninterrupted minutes. When I got out, I could hear someone calling for me downstairs. I almost got back in.