I wanted the children to fall asleep before my patience did

Dear Delyara, That was the goal, honestly. Not because bedtime was especially difficult. Because I could feel the edges of myself starting to fray, and I know that dangerous stage now. The point where every extra question sounds louder, every repeated instruction feels more personal, and kindness starts costing more than I have left to spend freely. So yes, tonight I was not only doing bedtime. I was racing my own depletion. That’s such an unromantic truth about motherhood, but I think it deserves more honesty. Sometimes loving your children at the end of the day means trying to get them safely into sleep before your own nervous system becomes unfair.