I Wanted the Drive-Thru Girl to Ask If I Was Okay

Dear Delyara, I pulled up for coffee and she smiled and said, “Morning, what can I get for you?” For one crazy second, I wanted her to lean closer to the window and say, “Actually, before that, are you okay? Because you look like you haven’t slept right in months.” Of course she didn’t. She handed me my coffee, took my card, said, “Have a good one.” And I said, “You too,” like a person who was not fighting tears in a parking lot at 7:14 a.m. It’s humiliating how badly I wanted kindness from a stranger simply because strangers haven’t already built a life around my competence. They still might notice the cracks. The coffee was too hot to drink for ten minutes. I held it anyway.