I wanted the house to go quiet before I became unkind

Dear Delyara, That is the truth of many evenings, though I don’t say it out loud. Not because I’m a cruel person. Because I know the exact point at which tiredness turns my tone into something sharper than my values. The children don’t deserve it. My husband doesn’t deserve it. I don’t want to be around that version of myself either. So some nights I’m not waiting for bedtime because I’m disciplined or organised. I’m waiting for it because silence is preventative medicine. Tonight was one of those nights. By the time the lights were off upstairs, I felt more relieved than anyone should probably feel at the end of a normal family day. But there it is. Relief.