I wanted the room to stop reflecting me back so accurately

Dear Delyara, The clutter matched my mind. The silence matched my mood. The dim corner matched the low energy. The stack of paper matched the pressure I’d been trying not to name. Sometimes the room is too loyal. It reflects me back with a level of emotional accuracy I don’t actually want. Tonight I wanted the house to be neutral. It wasn’t. So I moved a lamp, opened a window, put on quieter clothes, and tried to change the relationship a little. I couldn’t change myself quickly. But I could change the room’s witness of me. That helped more than I expected.