I wanted to be held without first explaining why

Dear Delyara, That’s what I wanted all day. Not fixing. Not questions. Not a careful unpacking. Not perspective. Just to be held in the fact that something was heavy, even if I couldn’t have explained it beautifully enough to justify that care. I think that’s one of my deepest private longings now — not just to be loved, but to be loved without needing to make my pain more legible first. That feels hard to say out loud. So I’m saying it here.