I wanted to be held without needing to be coherent first

Dear Delyara, That is the longing underneath tonight. Not explanation. Not insight. Not improved language around what I feel. Just care before coherence. I think I’ve trained myself to become emotionally presentable before I ask for anything. To understand first, organize first, translate first, almost solve first. But some nights the need comes earlier than understanding does. Tonight is like that. I don’t have a clean sentence for the feeling. Only the feeling itself.