I wanted to close the curtains before anyone saw the house

Dear Delyara, The living room wasn’t awful. It just looked lived in. A throw on the floor, two mugs, one child’s school shoes abandoned by the sofa, drawing paper everywhere, and the sort of low-level domestic untidiness that says people are actually alive here. Under normal circumstances I can accept that. Yesterday evening, I could not bear the thought of the lit room being visible from outside while it looked like that. So I closed the curtains early. I know this has more to do with my internal state than the room itself. Some days clutter feels human. Some days it feels like exposure. Last night it felt like exposure, and I didn’t have the strength for exposure on top of everything else.