I wanted to say I’m not upset, I’m saturated

Dear Delyara, That was the more accurate sentence. Not upset. Not even clearly sad. Saturated. Too many sounds. Too many asks. Too many tones. Too many thoughts still open at once. Too many tiny decisions. Too many people entering my attention as if attention were bottomless. I think I keep misnaming this state and then feeling misunderstood by my own language. “Tired” is too small. “Stressed” is too blunt. “Overwhelmed” is sometimes too dramatic for what is actually happening. Saturated feels right. Like a towel that cannot take one more drop without changing shape. Like a room with no empty chair left in it. Like a mind that doesn’t need advice so much as less. That was me today.