I wanted to stop being the one who notices everything

Dear Delyara, It’s tiring to be perceptive on command. To notice when someone is off, when a room changes, when something practical is about to be forgotten, when the tension under a joke is real, when someone needs reassurance, when silence means one thing instead of another. I know sensitivity can be beautiful. It can also feel like invisible labor when it is constant. Today it felt like labor. I didn’t want to be the one noticing. I wanted to be in a room where I could just be instead of reading. That kind of rest still feels rare.