I wanted to stop feeling like a collection of tasks

Dear Delyara, There are days when I stop feeling like a person and start feeling like a list. Work thing. House thing. Message thing. Money thing. Health thing. Reminder thing. Emotional thing. Something I forgot thing. Something I’m avoiding thing. All of it stacked, none of it quite large enough on its own to justify the weight it creates together. That was today. I want my life to feel more inhabited than managed. Lately it has felt too managed. I think that is why even a small moment of softness can feel almost sacred now. It reminds me I’m still in here somewhere.